I was recently discussing the current status of the United States with someone. He was offering a litany of things wrong in America today. It resembled what you might hear on the evening news. Issue after issue, crisis upon crisis. And he wasn’t wrong—all of the example he gave happened and are terrible. America isn’t perfect—heck, that might be the one issue both sides of the aisle can agree on.
But I’ll tell you what I know to be true. She’s also not as terrible as you hear on the news.
I think back on some of what I’ve seen in the last couple months that didn’t make headlines.
A new couple dancing under a star full of skies at a wedding. Communities gathering to remember those whom they have lost with a cafeteria full of home cooked dishes. People sharing their mental health struggles in hopes of encouraging others. Babies being adopted. Families together smiling for backdrop pictures at stock shows. A little girl holding baby kittens. A fundraiser for a high school football star who will need ACL surgery. A tearful embrace between two friends to celebrate a joyous occasion. Men and women of all faiths and backgrounds holding up a family when a pilar of the community was suddenly gone. A couple of kids riding their horses down the road to visit their neighbor. People dropping everything to pray for strangers. Friends driving from other states to attend a rosary for someone’s mother. Kindergartners so excited as they learn to read and pre-schoolers repeating parts of the school fight song they heard at a pep rally.
If we turn off the tv and look around, I just think we would see a very different America. A country full of beautiful stories they will never be seen on a tv screen. One that is certainly still imperfect, but of which I think we could be pretty proud.
I went to a beautiful rosary last night. When they invited friends and family up to speak, a man said “the best thing you can put on a child is your shadow.”
Man, isn’t that true.
I think back to my own childhood and what I remember is the time my parents invested in me. Whether it was hours at the show barn or setting irrigation tubes. Studying judging contest questions or shooting free throws. Practicing speeches to watching volleyball games. My parents, and numerous other adults in my life, put their shadow on me, and that’s a gift for which I will always be grateful. I remember one night after a particularly stressful night working sheep and pigs at the show barn, my Dad said, “It may not always be fun, but you’ll remember I was always here.” That’s always stuck with me—there is an important gift in someone’s presence.
It’s so easy to get caught up in everything else—life and activities and clothes and the list goes on and on. There will always be dishes to wash and laundry to fold and floors to clean. But there won’t always be little people around on whom we can put our shadows.
The most important thing we can do is be intentional about spending time with our kids. I’m grateful for the reminder. I love the visual with the statement about the shadow. I don’t think I I’ll ever forget it.
Someone recently asked me what I most hoped to teach my children.
There are so many things, aren’t there? How to pull a baby lamb and saddle a horse and water ski. How to pick up after themselves (soon please!!), be winners, and have the confidence to speak to a crowd. How to spot someone hurting and make a perfect pancake and appreciate green chile.
But at the end of the day, the answer for me is simple.
I hope I teach them to love well. Jesus. Themselves. Each other. Everyone else.
When I became friends with my law school bestie, Brett, I didn’t know his family would basically adopt me as well. I’ve got so many memories of nights at his parents’ house, games at The Pit, dinners at Pelican. They had me over the night before I sat for the bar exam. Mike and Margo always treated me as one of their own.
Anyone who knew Mike thought he was their biggest fan, myself included. He had a gift.
In the Jewish faith, they say, “may his memory be a blessing.” Mike’s will, of that, I am certain.
This article was written as part of Progressive Farmer’s Our Rural Roots.
On a family vacation to a sheep show (do other people actually take family vacations without involving a stock trailer?), I watched my kids hiking the trails and playing on the sandy beaches of Lake Tahoe. It was breathtakingly beautiful. It was the perfect, sunny day for our first trip to see such a large body of water and our first time ever to sink our toes into the warm sand of a beach. The look of wonder on their little faces was priceless.
I realized, though, standing on the hills above the bright blue water with the snow-capped mountains in the distance, that I have seen that look before.
Those expressions of absolute joy, excitement, and almost disbelief that life can be this good appears in less majestic places, too. It was there the first time I showed them how to make s’mores in the microwave and every time they ride our old horse Lou. It’s therewhen they go check irrigation ditches with their Grandad; when they hear their Aunt Elaine is coming to visit or when they sneak into Nan’s kitchen for a cookie before dinner. I’ve seen it when they catch a frog; when our first squash plant sprouts in the garden and when they bottle feed a new baby lamb.
Children hold a secret that adults too often forget: Joy can be ever present. Daily life can be viewed as a grand adventure.
So, here’s to living with eyes that seek wonder in the day-to-day no matter our age. Here’s to taking time to discover a child-like delight in life, regardless of the location. Here’s to microwaved s’mores and the shores of Lake Tahoe and taking precious moments to appreciate both.
There are a lot of things I hope to teach my kids. Always being up for an adventure is one of them.
I’m so grateful for my twenties when I did things like hop a plane on 24 hours notice to watch an OSU game and drink a limee at the Penny. I’ll remember drinking coffee in Vienna and white water rafting in Costa Rica and hiking in the hills above Switzerland. I’ve stood in the locker room and rushed the field at Notre Dame Stadium and ran a half marathon across the Golden Gate Bridge and ate lasagna and gelato on the streets of Rome. I’ve dressed fancy for Tavern on the Green, snorkeled in Cozumel, and drank wine all day and margaritas all night in Napa.
As for these two? Well, they’ve already dipped their toes in Lake Tahoe and seen dolphins on a boat in the Gulf of Mexico. They’ve hiked in Palo Duro Canyon and shown sheep at the Nugget All American and sipped juice in vineyards in Fredericksburg. They’ve done a polar plunge and a Raptor Run and a kid pony show.
As I was watching Braun walk into kindergarten yesterday, I couldn’t help but smile.
Two weeks into school, and I had seen him head in that door one day with a Hobbs Show Lamb shirt and another day with a Foscalina Club Lambs cap.
Most people at his little a school won’t know who these people are or where they’re from. But Braun does.
He knows that his Hobbs show lamb shirt came from his friend Megan who lives in Kansas. He knows that at Reno, she always took time to say hi to him and that he was welcome to come to her camp and hang out.
He knows that Foscalina Club Lambs hat came from his friend, Mr. Charlie in California. The guy who let Braun’s mad Harper sit with him for at least an hour of the ram show drawing dinosaur pictures on notepads and who we send cookies to in the mail.
And here’s what I think we can overlook. This 5 year old little boy has adults across the country in his corner. I just have to think that matters.
I read a lot when we write about the benefits of showing livestock. There are many. Learning responsibility, animal care, time with family, earning scholarships…the list goes on and on. But I don’t often hear the value of kids knowing they have other adults in their corner.
I know that was a big deal for me, knowing how many adults cared about me, rooted for me, and had my back. I think it really helped give me the confidence I have today.
I’m loving see it become a big deal for my kids as well. If it takes a village to raise a child, I’m grateful to have these kind of people in mine.
My friend named Ron has a hard life. Most days he stands on his corner with a sign asking for help. That’s where I met him.
For two years now, I’ve stopped when I see him to say hi. I always make it a point to call him by name and to tell him I am glad to see him. I worry that he might not hear that very much.
I wish I could do something big for him…but mostly it’s cups of coffee when it’s a cold, bottles of water, protein bars, or a couple of dollars.
This weekend, I stopped and had a bag of strawberries left over from the lake. I told him I knew it was weird, but offered him the bag. You would have thought he won the lottery. Turns out, strawberries are his favorite, and he hadn’t had them in years.
I know it’s hard to feel like you can’t do enough or that what you have to give doesn’t matter…I also think those thoughts are lies from the devil to keep us from doing what we can. So look around. Do what you can where you are. Maybe your leftover strawberries can make someone’s day….
I travel a lot. For work. For fun. With kids. Internationally. it’s one of my favorite things!
A while back , someone asked me for a list of travel tips. I thought on it for a while, and have come up with my top ten travel tips (plus a little bonus one) to share.
1. Have separate toiletry items.
If you are a frequent traveler, this is an absolute must! I have two of everything I need. Tooth brush, tooth paste, face wash, moisturizer, leave in conditioner, hair brush, chapstick, soap, shampoo…. This allows me to essentially always be packed. I have a zipper pouch that holds all of my travel toiletry items and when I leave for a trip, I just throw it in. When I get home, I just put it back in the cabinet. I don’t worry about whether I remembered to pack my tooth brush after I used it the morning I was leaving. It saves me a ton of time and brain capacity to just know if I grab my pouch, I’ve got everything I need.
2. Clean the house as best you can before you leave.
This one can be tough sometimes when you’re scrambling to get out the door, but I hate coming home to a messy house. It makes me insane. So I always try to at least do major things like make beds, pick up toys off the floor, and wash dishes before I leave town. It just makes my return feel less chaotic.
3. Before you leave, identify an easy meal for your first night home.
Nothing makes me fly mad more than having traveled all day, rolling into the driveway exhausted and hearing the question: “So what are you making for dinner?” Makes me want to clock someone with a frying pan. So, I’ve taken to trying to have a meal figured out for my first night home before I leave. I try to have something easy like a freezer meal or a frozen pizza or sandwiches. Again, it’s just something I can do before I leave to make my return better.
4. Have a sleep routine.
Sleeping well in a hotel can be hard. One thing I have found useful is having a sleep routine at home that I can take on the road. That way there is at least something similar to home to tell my body to give it up for the night. It doesn’t have to be complicated. I take my Calm magnesium powder with me, have a travel size of my favorite sleep aromatherapy lotion from Bath and Body Works, and try to take time to write in my journal. They’re simple things, but they help me to wind down wherever I am.
5. Stock up on blank notebooks.
Here’s a tip for those of you traveling with little ones. Get yourself some blank notebooks. Better get, hoard the free ones you get at trade shows or as gifts or marketing materials. My kids get a new notebook to take on every trip. They pack it in their carry on backpack along with an extra change of clothes (I’m always prepared if someone pukes or spills their drink…) and some markers. Sometimes they draw what we see on the trip like a journal. Other times, they draw their favorite animals or draw stories they make up. The key here is it isn’t messy, it’s quiet, and it doesn’t have a million pieces.
6. Have rules set before you leave.
Here’s another traveling with kids tip for you. Have some basic rules set before you ever leave. Yours may be different than mine, but think about things that are important and non-negotiable. For example, I don’t carry kids in an airport. Period. I tell them that before we leave the house. If you want to fly on a plane, you walk in the airport. So when someone’s feet get tired and they start begging for a ride, I remind them of the rule and that usually is the end of it since they were prepped well before hand.
7. Rent your car seats with the rental car.
Some people disagree here, but I’m a big proponent of renting car seats when you get there and not lugging those bad boys through the airport. You want to know who looks the most exhausted and angry at the airport? The dude lugging a car seat or two. It’s with the extra money for me to just get the car seats with the car when we arrive.
8. Pack lots of snacks. Then double that amount.
Snacks are the key to keeping my kids from melting down whether we are on a road trip or a plane. Take far more snacks than you need, because you may need to burn a few of those bad boys to survive the last 15 minutes of a flight or something. And if I’m honest, I hate being hangry too, so this really applies to me as well. I got stuck once after an emergency landing with no food while we waited hours for another plane. I vowed to never crawl on a plane without some of snack in my carry on again.
9. Always take a jacket on the plane.
I don’t care if it’s 115 degrees outside, I will be cold on a plane. It never fails. So even if I’m in shorts and a t-shirt, I will carry on a jacket or sweater because I just know I will be cold and miserable shortly after take off.
10. Use the same vendors to take advantage or points.
If you’re not a loyalty member or whatever at your favorite hotel chain, rental car location, and airline, you’re leaving money on the table. I always have points to get a free flight here or hotel stay there. I keep a note in my phone with all my loyalty numbers for all the different hotel chains so I am never without it. I also rack up tons of points on my Southwest Airlines credit card, which is a great option to get free flights if you just pay it off every month.
Bonus: Take the free hotel soaps and donate them to your local homeless shelter or resource center.
This is something I do every time I travel without fail. I collect the little travel soaps, shampoos, lotions, mouth wash, whatever they give you, and bring them home to donate. Our local homeless resource center loves to get the big bag I bring in about three times a year. Think about how good a nice shower with good soap and some fresh smelling lotion would feel if you had been stuck outside in the hot sun or freezing rain. It’s a simple little thing that can make a big difference to our neighbors without homes. In addition to the travel soaps and the like, I also take Keriug pods, tea bags, and empty plastic or paper cups. All of these are appreciated by my local resource center.
So there you have it. Also always remember something my kids have taught me…look at everything in life an adventure. Happy travels!